Jump to content


MOVING

The forum has been moved to a new server.

Please visit QuakerParrotForum.net

and register there to participate in the community.

 

We will do our best to maintain these archives so that you can still search and find answers to your Quaker questions!


Photo

Blonde Painter


  • Please log in to reply
2 replies to this topic

#1 quakers1222

quakers1222

    Adv Member

  • Members
  • 328 posts
  • Location:ohio
  • Country:united states

Posted 23 February 2009 - 12:00 AM

The blonde was broke and desperate. She knocked on the door of a doctor's
house and said she needed money and would be willing to work for it. The doctor
asked if she would be willing to paint his porch. He would give her $50 to do
it.
The blonde said that would be fine. The doctor's wife said the blonde must be
really dumb to do such a big job for only $50. "Does she realize that the porch
goes all the way? Around the house?" the wife asked. "I guess so," the doctor
told his wife. A few minutes later, the blonde knocked on the door. "All done,"
she said, "and by the way, it's not a porch, it's a Ferrari."


another one


A beautiful, well-dressed blonde seats herself in the first class cabin on a
cross-country flight, and settles her in for the trip, smiling prettily at
admiring passengers seated around her.

Underway, a flight attendant soon approaches the blonde and says, 'Miss, I'm
sorry, but I see that your ticket is for coach, and you're seated in first
class; I'm afraid you'll have to move.'
The blonde replies, 'I'm blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York
to be a model.'


Slightly incredulous, the attendant alerts the senior flight attendant.

The senior attendant approaches the blonde and says, politely,'I'm sorry,
Miss, but since your ticket is for coach, you'll have to move back.'


The blonde replies, sweetly, 'I'm Blonde, and I'm beautiful, and I'm going to
New York to be a model' -- and shows no signs of moving.
Frustrated, the senior attendant informs the captain, and he says he'll deal
with the problem. He turns over flight control, walks to the rear, and observes
the blonde seated comfortably in first class.


Approaching her with a smile, the captain leans over and speaks quietly into
the blonde's ear. Almost immediately, the blonde gathers her things, gets up,
and moves quickly to the coach compartment.

Amazed, the senior flight attendant asks the captain, 'Captain, I'm impressed
... what did you say to her?'
The captain grinned slyly and said, 'I just told her that the first class
cabin doesn't go to New York.'


and another

The silver haired lady confronted her doctor with a
Complaint of pains all over her body.

"Be more precise," he said. "So I can help you, try pointing to some of the
places that hurt.

The silver-haired doll put her finger on her arm and said, "Ouch!" then her
finger to her hip and said, "Ouch!" and then to her rib cage and said, "Ouch!"
again.

The doctor stopped her and asked, "Were you a blonde before your hair grayed"?


"Why yes!" she said excitedly, "But how did you know?"

The Doc answered, "Your fingers broken."


and another lol


A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana.
She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very
reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the
shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own
alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"

The shopkeeper said, "By all means, is my guest. Maybe
You’ll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"

Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching
herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home, when he spots the young
woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a
huge 9 foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the
creature and with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank. Laying
nearby were several more of the dead creatures.

The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the alligator
on it's back, and frustrated, shouts out, "**** **, this
One isn't wearing any shoes either!"




ok that is all i promise for now anyway lol


#2 jujusaffiemom

jujusaffiemom

    Adv Member

  • Members
  • 2,240 posts
  • Location:TEXAS
  • Country:usa

Posted 05 October 2009 - 01:24 PM

lol i love all of them

#3 NICKO

NICKO

    Member

  • Members
  • 15 posts
  • Gender:Male
  • Country:Australia

Posted 15 July 2010 - 01:40 AM

AWESOME