Granted but then they start shoting at you.

Wish I had a goldfish pond.

Granted but you have to keep replacing the fish since the wild life keeps eating them...

I wish I could get along with my Ex better for the kiddies...

granted but now your ex is thinking of moving back in!


I wish my tiel would quit biting my ankle!!

Granted,but Belle poos on the carpet instead


I wish i could find Mr.Right

granted but Mr Right is already married

i wish i could solve my friends marrage problems

GRANTED ... BUT NOW THEY ARE your PROBLEMS!

I wish I made more money.

granted but the time you would of spent working you would be replaced by chewing and blowing bubble gum.


I wish I had a krispy kreme donut

granted but it make u gain 15 pounds........

i wish i wsa already done with tomorrows 550mile drive !

Granted but you drove in the wrong direction! You have to 1100 miles tomorrow!

I wish I had remembered to buy cereal for breakfast tomorrow!

Granted... you did say you wanted to buy every box of cerial in the shop, didn't you?

I wish I had something exciting to eat for dinner

granted but now the mariachi band that made it exciting WON'T LEAVE!

I wish my lake floatee would inflate ITSELF so I wouldn't turn blue trying to do it!

Granted, but it falls apart the first time you use it.

I wish these bruises would hurry up and heal so I could wear shorts again.

Granted, then there's freak snow for three months.

I wish My horse could drive herself... she's so far away...

granted ... but now she only drives herself around and around on a carousel!

I wish hockey season would start soon!

granted, but your cable goes out before every game

I wish I slept better at night

granted but your mattress has to be filled with pinto beans


I wish there was better stuff on tv!

Granted, but now those better shows have the same episodes every day!

I wish 8 months would hurry up so my little qp can hurry up and come home

Granted but he bites you as soon as he sees you.

I wish the water level wasn't so low in the rivers.

granted but you will need to use two tubes to stay buoyant


I wish I could just blink and all my work would be done.

Granted, but every time you blink the fun stuff will be done too.

I wish my shed could clean itself out.

granted but its contents will be replaced with bags of bird seed


I wish I didnt have a need for lawyers.

granted, but now the lawyers need YOU... and call you all the time.

I wish it was 2:00

Granted, But it's 2:00 one month ago.



I wish i had a swimming pool and hotub in my appartment building.

granted, but they're in a walk-in freezer.

I wish I had a box of brownies

Granted, But your allergic to chocolate


I wish i had my own limo service to drive me around.

granted but your limo driver would be a chimpanze


I wish someone would eat the rest of these peaches

Granted but then they would puke in your kitchen!

I wish the pool we are taking care of was heated!

Granted, but it was so hot it all turned to steam!

I wish I didn't have to go practise my flute now

granted but now your socks will never match



I wish I would stop procrastinating

granted but now everything is done 4 weeks in advance and you never have time for yourself!

i wish is was sunday and i was done with my vacation playing with my MoJo and my pups!!! ( i miss home........)

granted ... but now EVERY day is Sunday and you KNOW you spend every Sunday in church ... also, you can no longer have ANY vacations



I wish my windows would wash themselves

granted but you will have to wiggle while they are self washing


I wish all of us could meet and have one big parrot party!

Granted, but you get lost on the way and never make it to the party and never get to meet anyone.


I wish i had an endless supply of food in my house.



P.S. That would be super super cool if we all COULD actually meet and have a big parrot party.

granted ... but it is ALL liver and onions FOREVER!

I wish I owned my own horse

But he decided that he was going to live in your house-like Impy's friends! ha ha

I wish it wasnt I wasnt so sunburned.

granted but you will have to swim in a vat of lime green jello with carrot shreds in it first



I wish I had more fluffier pillows

Granted, but they are filled with down you are allergic to

I wish I could invent a self cleaning cage

granted ... but it makes so much noise you can't sleep ... and you KNOW how often the fids poop!!!


I wish I could afford the wedding my daughter WANTS! *sigh*

granted but you will have to wear a lime green mumu with pink tennis shoes to it ..curlers optional



I wish that everyone would vote the wiggling freak off americas got talent.

granted, but then William Hung will serenade you personally every night! lol



I wish I didn't have to have surgery

granted but now your arm falls off at the shoulder!


I wish (hope!) they can FIX my computer as I send it to them, rather than just money-back (On the up-side, I get to shop on ebay again! )

Granted, but it would require that all your files be dumped and never retrieved.

I wish that my Pickles could come home.

granted .. but he turns out to be a non-stop screamer and you need earplugs.


I wish it was payday TODAY!

granted but I already spent it for you


i wish this house was cleaner.the pet sitters obviously took care of the pets and not the house ........ but u know if it had to be one of the two im glad it was my babys that had good care , the house can just keep me busy for a few days and i love my friends who did it for me!!

granted but all the mess will end up in the attic



I wish I could play the piano

Granted, but you'll be blind playing it just like Stevie Wonder.


I wish i had my own hair stylist and makeup artist to do my hair and makeup everyday forever.

granted but now your makeup is as heavy as Tammy Fae Bakers andyour hair looks like the bride of franenstines

i wish i had more energy

Granted, but that energy is spent cleaning windows


I wish i had my own bowling alley in my house.

granted but now its to noisy and the neighbors are puttingin complaints to the local cops!


i wish i had a better more uptodate MAC instead of my 10 year old one!!!

Granted, but it's still running System 6


I wish the weather in Britain was better!