Clyde has always had a thing about hair. He loves to pull it and preen it and toss it around and squeal. He grooms my husband's eyebrows but leaves mine alone. Recently he has begun working on my arm hairs, moles and occasionally freckles. The arm hairs I don't mind so much. He likes to pluck them out.

I can spare them and as long as he's happy, I'm happy. However, I really must object to his attempts to remove moles and freckles. That does smart a bit. When I try to explain to him that he really ought to let them be, I get this grumbling kind of low squawk that sounds like cussing. I'm sure this will pass when the weather's cool enough to wear long sleeves again, but really.

HOW does one explain to a parrot that a mole or freckle is not a bug or foreign object but actually part of his person and said person would just as soon he wouldn't try to pull them off?

He's a very determined parrot.