Hi, as some of you may know, over six months ago, my father passed suddenly at the age of 54. I and my Mother were devastated, and there's hardly a day that goes by that we don't think of him in some way.
After all this time, the shock is wearing off, and things are starting to sink in more. In one way it's good, and in other ways bad.

I finally got around to writing down something for my Dad, as something I would say to him, trying to sum up so many feelings and so many memories I'm grateful for. I have shared it on my deviant art account, but I also wanted to share it here. I have found a great deal of good people here that have not only been there for me in rough times past, but through this one which is by far the hardest.
I am amazed how I've handled things this far, and also surprised that this loss has also somehow taught to love those I still have even more, and just be grateful for as many things as I can.

This is what I wrote for my Dad.

"Dad,
There are so many words to say, and yet none will ever feel like enough to convey the honor of having had you as my father.
You instilled in me so many valued lessons and wisdoms for which I will never forget. You always respected me for who I was, and always encouraged me in my craft. You taught me how to be resourceful in many ways, and even included me in some of the at-home construction projects.
I'm forever grateful for the infinite conversations we used to have about our lives, our pets, the Mayans, the pyramids, space & science, and God. I'm also grateful for the times you guided me through when I wasn't sure who I was, who I should be, and what I should be doing with my life.
It's because of you that I finally know who I am, and that I am proud of how far I've come.

You told me once that you and Mom didn't have any special plans for me when I was to be born. You both loved me and wanted me regardless of who I'd turn out to be. Only now do I feel just how overwhelming that love is.

I always knew you and Mom had something special together. I hope one day, I will find something similar, even if it hurts like hell sometimes. A man that can be such a great Dad, husband, and get on the floor to play with his crazy dog is the best kind of person I could've had as an example of what to look for.

I will try my hardest never to forget your face, your crude construction worker sense of humor, your contagious laugh, and the sense of honesty in not only your workmanship, but with your family.

Even though you are no longer in life with me, I still feel you around me, guiding me when I feel lost. Your blood runs through my veins, your inner strength lives in my heart, and your presence will always be with me one way or another.

Even if you were a little rough around the edges for Heaven, I know you managed to charm St. Peter into letting you in anyway.

I'll love you forever, Dad.
~Angie"

Thanks to everyone who reads this, and for being there when I'd just lost him. ~Angela

Angela, that tribute to your father could not be any better. It sounds so much like my own father who, thank God, left me his sense of humor and his moral standards.

It sounds like you have come a long way in six months and have savored the values given to you by this man who led your life down a wonderful path to become the young woman you are today.

No, the image of his face will never leave you, of that I am sure. The values he instilled in your heart, soul and the spirit he left for you will always be with you as well.

Be blessed sweetie and if it makes you sad to think of him every day, please know it's worth it anyway!
He would be so proud of you for writing this and for sharing it with us.

That is so beautifully written. what a lovley tribute to your father.

I am so sorry for your loss. Your tribute was very nice and I am sure he is smiling down on you and your family.

Beautiful ... you are a gifted writer and one lucky, cherished daughter.

Jen

That was beautiful! Thanks for sharing it with us.

I agree that that was beautiful. He would be so proud of you. Hugs to ya.

You made me cry ....
My son lost his father just before his 11th birthday and this year my son graduates high school and I wish his daddy could be here to see him...

What a wonderful, soulful legacy your daddy left you. Memories that are sweet and will stay with you for the rest of your life... They will nestle inside of you until you can't separate the memories from "who you are."
It is what we've been through that makes us who we are. And even though some of what we've been through has been bitter-sweet, you'll need that someday also.

And yes, losing someone so close changes our perspective on life. We tend to live each day as though it could be our last.... I believe that is good, however, it makes me impatient with the pettiness that so clouds the vision of people around me.

Life is good. Life is short. Love is most important. And relationships are what it's ALL about.
As you've already experienced; there's one thing that will last throughout all eternity - and that is relationships.....
the legacy, the trail behind the shooting star. You know, a shooting star is really a sun that burned out a long, long time ago, but we can see the trail blazing across the sky light years later ... now THAT'S what I'm talking about!
I hope to someday leave that for my children and grandchildren. I hope I can.

Godspeed dear girl.
Kim